Another day, another Kennedy with a substance abuse problem

Pithy title, no? I don't know that I have much more to say than that, but it has been a while since I posted, and I figured I had to start somewhere.

Actually, I have drafted about three "serious me" posts of late--part of the Many Moods of Raplicious series. But, hey, c'mon, when another Democrat makes a butt of himself in public, it's stop-the-presses time. Just ask the folks at Fox News, the home of unfair and imbalanced reporting.

Please don't let me be misunderstood, to quote Santa Esmeralda featuring Leroy Gómez. (I know the Animals did the song originally, but Shallow Hallieberry that I am, I always have preferred the flamenco disco version.) Despite the occasional nod at the polls to an Independent or Libertarian candidate, I have been a lifelong Democrat, at least up until I moved to Pennsylvania, where I registered with the Green Party. Consider it my little flourish of pixie dust and taste-the-rainbow Skittles-exotica in an otherwise dreary political landscape.

But let's face it--the Democrats seem deader in the water than the unconscious passenger in a Kennedy-driven vehicle. And this despite a president who hasn't had an original idea since the phrase "9/11" first parted his speechwriter's lips. Yet the Dems remain more poorly organized than a two-car white trash funeral procession.

Lordy, even the Democrats' scandals lack originality and creativity. Why, Rush Limbaugh, the Right Wing's mouthpiece (through which he apparently takes 20 illicitly acquired pain-relief tablets with plenty of water, repeating when necessary or the mood strikes him) and GlaxoSmithKline's new spokesmodel, got busted and headed into rehab just a week ago.

So come on, Green Party, you can do it. I know you can deliver a tofurkey loaf in every pot and an ethanol-sipping hybrid in every garage. Now that's what I call the good life.